Thursday, February 24, 2011


I haven't gotten much writing done this week because of the sickness plaguing me. However, I have made leaps and bounds on the first person issue. I wrote a comedy erotica in the first person (talk about squirming under first person!)and a about 10k more words in the story. I've also gone back and started changing the other stuff into first person. It's driving me crazy being unable to focus for very long.

Just a reminder, 99% of what I post is raw or early drafts so feel free to point out flaws and any grammar problems :D

End of chapter 7

"They turn into, well," I took a deep breath. Here goes nothing. "They turn into zombies."

The silence in the room is profound. I watch as a myriad of emotions cross his face: disbelief, confusion, thoughtfulness, then the awareness. He's put what I've told him together with whatever he knows. I can see it in his eyes. It's his turn to trust me.

"Spill it," I say.

He looks at me as if I'm a witch or something. "Spill what," he says carefully.

"Whatever it is that's making you believe me so easily. You know something. Now tell me what it is."

"It's nothing concrete really. I may be wrong."

I let out a frustrated sigh. "Tell me."

"I remember hearing about a group of elite soldiers that were killed. It was covered up."

"You think it has something to do with this. Why and how did you find out about it?"

"A team of our agents were down there on assignment. The army was their back up."

This was like pulling teeth. Whatever he had to say must be bad. "And?"

"And, our office got a hold of video footage. I saw it before it was confiscated." He pauses and looks me in the eye. "What I saw were men, running so fast they were a blur on the videos. Men who viciously attacked the agents. The other soldiers shot the attackers in the head. Six people died that day, including one of our agents."

"But how did they keep that out of the news? That's the part that's been bugging me all this time. If soldiers are losing it, someone would know."

"Yes, someone would know. I think they're killing anyone not willing to run the party line."

"But that means--" I can't say it.

He's nodding anyway. "That means you."

1 comment:

  1. Tense. Are you definitely going with present, cos at one point there it's in past... Either one will work - present is pretty good, actually. Makes it even more immediate :)